Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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