My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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