so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
