Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Randomize
