p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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