Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
