what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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