He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
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Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later