im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
