I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Terrible idea I love it
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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