do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
He is an equal opportunity slut.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
