:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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