Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
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