i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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