she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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