she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
