do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
