did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
