doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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