honey bunches of taint.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
