Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
