just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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