Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
