Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
