I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize