The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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