So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
