It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
