Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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