I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
