Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
