Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Randomize
