Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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