I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
