wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
