I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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