Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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