You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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