no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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