I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
