Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Randomize
