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  • Dane Cook wants his punchline back. Just kidding, he endorses stealing material.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:39pm
  • God is stupid. And so are you all.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 6:01pm
  • i've turned a student loan payment into a mountain of coke.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:26pm
  • His next move will be to turn your life into a wallowing mess of debt and alcoholism.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:44pm
  • And you shit your guts out the next day too!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 8:19pm
  • same with the dane cook, but i do love christ chex.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:44pm
  • -10 points for tagged on Dane Cook reference.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:08am
  • Everyone makes a big deal about Jesus dying I mean holy shit 100,000s of thpunsands people die in worse ways all the time

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 20, 09 at 12:35am
  • oppress: to burden with cruel or unjust impositions or restraints; subject to a burdensome or harsh exercise of authority or power really...Christian's oppress people?? All they do is share what they believe...which is exactly what everyone else is doing on here...and there's nothing wrong with that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 18, 09 at 10:50am
  • I'm so glad I worked three jobs to put myself through college with classmates like you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:06pm
  • i'll do you one better... turning a scholarship into booze. now there's a great idea!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 10:17pm
  • Natty light is for bitches

    Submitted by SeductivePotato on Jul 21, 10 at 10:45am
  • 10:50 you mean push what they believe and persecute others for things that go wrong, Christians have a "little" history with killing Jews so don't say that any religion is completely innoccent

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 3, 10 at 9:04pm
  • He also didn't exist, so you really beat him there.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 2:45am
  • i lol'd ...literally

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 1:19pm
  • Whoever wrote this proooobably goes to lindenwood.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 7:15pm
  • 4:05 can't talk shit if they're religious. They're already a moron

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:23pm
  • Hell isn't a real place, just a weak idea made by weak people. Just like the idea of god. Fuck yourselves religious ppl.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:51pm
  • clever dane line. Natty light sucks ass though

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:45pm
  • Not only did He turn water into wine but He also DIED for you. your move.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 2:33am
  • i can turn natty light into a student loan

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 10:53pm
  • Natty may be nasty but it's still funny as hell!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 9:54pm
  • Why the fuck wud u waste that much money on natty light? Might as well get wine, natty's total bitch beer.

    Submitted by Reges on Jul 4, 10 at 2:51am
  • Dane Cook is a silly bitch.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:03pm
  • F you. Natty light is my shit

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 11:12pm
  • He didn't pay shit for it like you will if you ever get out of college dumb ass!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:59pm
  • listen it happens, it's ok

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:39am
  • I really wish I could help you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 11:23pm
  • Has anyone ever thought about why people who aren't religious feel the need to oppose it?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 11:20pm
  • fuck u all PBR all the way ; p

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 18, 09 at 12:12am
  • uhh 5:00 apparently you're stupid. moron.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 5:19pm
  • Dane Cook is indeed, a silly bitch.

    Submitted by kateburke17 on Jul 12, 10 at 1:14am
  • Natty Light is piss water, get some real beer, not that weak high school shit.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 7:33pm
  • no need for the religious bashing. i don't talk shit in what You believe in

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:05pm
  • Haha. This text is made of win.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:21pm
  • i'm now inspired to go to college..

    Submitted by AliceINhollywood on Jul 5, 11 at 3:31pm
  • You guys need to chill on the "un original stuff" who cares it's funny get over it if you don't like It don't read it!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:22am
  • Wine is better than Natty Light...hell, piss is better than natty light and I can change water into piss without trying...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:34pm
  • Dane cook sweet

    Submitted by finleytime on Apr 26, 10 at 12:15am
  • Haha this text just made my day.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 8:04pm
  • Natty goes great with cocaine.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 5:09pm
  • Just a joke from sickipedia with words changed... Go do something interesting and get back 2 us all! CUNT!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:06pm
  • My mommy always said; 'Stupid is as stupid does." Even God can't fix STUPID!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:10pm
  • Dane Cook is sexy.

    Submitted by kateburke17 on Feb 4, 11 at 6:25pm
  • Haha do u go to Missouri baptist? This is straight chesterfield up in here *HighRoad*

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 10:20pm
  • I just lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 4, 10 at 8:42pm
  • Sounds like my fiance

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 5:03pm
  • How does a man die for another man. That's the silliest shit I've ever heard

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:49pm
  • there was one like this a while ago... fake

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:59pm
  • Natty's are so nasty.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 5:08pm
  • Tacitus mentioned Christians, not Jesus. Not that his powers are any more real than Uri Gellar's or a magician who pulls a rabbit out of a hat.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 3:52am
  • @ 8:52 that's NOT FUNNY. nuns are raped as often as altar boys, especially abroad, but it's covered up too. there have been many exposes on this but the roman catholic church does nothing about it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:18am
  • Impressive 1053. I'd like to learn how to do that

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 11:11pm
  • i've turned a student loan into a shit load of jim beam

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:28pm
  • I piss Blue Moon when I'm drunk and MGD when I'm sober. Beat that JC

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:18pm
  • natty light sucks really bad though, should've invested in something nicer, like coronas ;).

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 10:51pm
  • >.< once again ...TFLN publishes unoriginal crap thats not even funny

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:45pm
  • please lets not glorify the idiocy that is dane cook

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 9:44pm
  • I'm glad you capitalized that 4:05, because I AM ACTUALLY GOD!!!!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 4:25pm
  • 1235...Jesus died in the most tortuous way in the history of the world b

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 20, 09 at 3:52am
  • love the dane cook shout out

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 5:19pm
  • 11:20 perhaps it's because Christians cannot keep religion private and have a history of oppressing those who believe differently as well as not at all. If you keep your made up faith out of my government, schools, hospitals, and bedroom, we're cool. Do your thing. Anything else is fascism.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:14am
  • Hahaha. Natty light sucks though...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:39pm
  • @12:14 You and I would get along just fine. Well played.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 6:56am
  • DANE ROCKS it's a miracle in a bowl Christ chec

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 12:39am
  • 3:01 is going 2 burn in hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 3:21pm
  • Robbie Alvarez your a fuckin idiot.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 9:59am
  • You believe in JC or Perish for ever

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 7:50am
  • Hell, I could have sent this

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 6:26pm
  • My newest best friend......

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:38pm
  • That's not even funny I think yal should be ashamed!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 9:00pm
  • Hello Dane cook wanna be and also a fat one natty is nasty

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 6:55pm
  • THIS IS SO OLD! Muppet.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 6:45pm