every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
