We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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