new low.... made out with someone while peeing
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
