Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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