...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
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