Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
