I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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