Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
