I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
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I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
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was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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