Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
