This girl is more easily done than said...
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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