meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
